Jolene was diagnosed with stage 4 breast cancer. Soon after they did an MRI and discovered little spots in her brain, liver and bones. As far as the best professionals could tell, her fate was sealed. She was not supposed to last more than a few months but it’s 4 years on now and she’s still around.
True to its reputation, bone cancer has made the last year exceptionally painful for Jolene. Brittle bones, bare nerves…I cannot even begin to imagine. Jolene says that there are good days and bad days.
But 2 weeks ago, things suddenly took taken a turn for the worse (could it have gotten any worse?). She was overwhelmed with excruciating pain all around and death seemed moments away.
In the same district lived Daven.
Daven one day discovered he had muscular dystrophy. The situation was so bad that the doctor didn’t think he would survive more than a couple of days. Daven asked for the family to be brought together and for arrangements to be made.
All his muscles were entirely paralysed except those between his forehead and his chin. He had a tube for breathing, a tube for eating and another tube for waste.
But 4 years on, this guy is still alive. Just like Jolene, Daven defies the odds.
But why though? Why can’t they just die?!
What perplexes me somewhat is that they are both active, respected and loved Baha’is.
5 months ago at a Baha’i conference in Malaysia, I saw Jolene, head conspicuously wrapped in a scarf to hide her balding, furiously taking notes as the speaker expounded on the theme of service. I couldn’t help thinking to myself, “this lady is going to go any time now but is behaving as if she has years of service ahead!”
I’ve heard that Daven was a Baha’i with a robust spirit. I am now told that his spirit has not diminished one bit. As he lies limp in his lounge room, unable to hold his prayer beads, he still recites his prayers using the bars on the grill to count where he is. 13 grills = 7 rounds plus 4 bars = 95 times where he calls out the name of God the All-Glorious – “Allah’u'Abha!”
I know there are many fervent, pure hearted and religious people of all faiths who are afflicted with similar tests. But my feeble mind has been trying to grasp an understanding of why? Of course I do not imagine myself to be able to comprehend the Divine wisdom any more than just my tiny allocation of insight, but it really fills me with wonder.
There is this story I heard of a man who became closer and closer to God the sicker and sicker he became! The more and more pain he was suffering through, the more and more radiant and joyful he became!
I am compelled to share this quotation from the Baha’i Writings and ask you to share with me the insights it inspires in you:
To the loyal soul, a test is but God’s grace and favour; for the valiant doth joyously press forward to furious battle on the field of anguish, when the coward, whimpering with fright, will tremble and shake. So too, the proficient student, who hath with great competence mastered his subjects and committed them to memory, will happily exhibit his skills before his examiners on the day of his tests. So too will solid gold wondrously gleam and shine out in the assayer’s fire.
It is clear, then, that tests and trials are, for sanctified souls, but , while to the weak, they are a calamity, unexpected and sudden.
These tests, even as thou didst write, do but cleanse the spotting of self from off the mirror of the heart, till the Sun of Truth can cast its rays thereon; for there is no veil more obstructive than the self, and however tenuous that veil may be, at the last it will completely shut a person out, and deprive him of his portion of eternal grace.
